I wrote this short letter after coming across an article in The Hindustan Times which reported, "Every hour, a student in India commits suicide due to exam stress."
OPEN LETTER FROM A MOTHER.
To my little girl, ?
The month of May is often dreadful as the board exam results are out. ?
Parents are restless. ? Students are restless. ?
And it's a time of immense joy or disappointment.
Newspapers glorify the headlines with photographs of toppers, half-buried by hugs and kisses from well-wishers. ?
Then, there are stats that show which city performed well. ?
Then, there are snippets that talk about students who scored well despite the issues they had to face at home. ?
And then there are tiny articles about students who committed suicide as they couldn't get the marks they had worked so hard for.
When I read all these news year after year, I have just one feeling; disappointment. ?
My little girl,
I'm really sorry that the world demands so much from you. ?
Right from the moment you dropped out of my belly, I have been ordering you to do this, or do that.
Play school or home school?
CBSE or State Board?
Science group or Commerce?
Engineering or medicine?
All this time,
I have forgotten to hear your choice.
I, as a mother, often fail to listen to the silent scream of your heart.?
I know how hard you have studied.
I know how many times you have memorized physics’ five mark questions or worked out the chemical equations. ?
I also know that you mugged math which you hate so much.
Somewhere down the line, as you started learning atoms or molecules, E = mc^2, mitochondria, big bang, ... I forgot to teach you things that matter; ?
Love and kindness, sharing and empathy, emotional intelligence, financial wisdom; feelings and skills that are so essential to lead life. ♥️✳️
I am pretty sure that whatever you have learnt in school isn’t going to help you much in life.?♀️
We - parents - send our children to school hoping that they become a great human.
But soon I realised that at the end of the day, real practical wisdom is taught at home. ?
Mera ladoo, ♥️
I know that your dad and I demand so much from you. We have often stressed you to score marks beyond your capabilities and make us proud.?
Maybe, we do that because we'll have the bragging rights during every khaandan meet and say, 'Mera beti scored 95%!' ?
We're just like you, my little girl;
Your generation prefers Instagram or FB likes?
We prefer showing off about your accomplishments in the presence of my in-laws or my siblings. ?
We want you to have the best of everything. ?
I promise that whatever marks you score, we won't compare your success or failure to someone else’s. I know it hurts and it is stupid when someone compares marks like a "Trivago Website" . ?
Always remember, just because your cousin or your classmate has scored good marks doesn't mean that they are going to succeed in life.?♀️
Sure, getting good marks will help you to get into a better college. But when you scores less, it isn’t the end of the world. ?
Do you know that most of the people who make an impact to the lives of the people around them are either dropouts or people who chose a degree they 'loved learning' or people who use their talent??
Study whatever you wish to study.? Engineering and Medicine are not the only hope for your future.
Choices make a million possibilities.
I want you to be happy.
I want you to live life on your own terms.
Be proud that you're a woman.
Don't become a victim of your wrong choices. Embrace the error and lead.
I know you wish for something different. We want you to be different.
And to be different, we need to shed our ancient thoughts and venture towards brand new horizons which normal people will hesitate to step in. ?
If you score low marks,
please do not be humiliated. ?
It's alright. Really.
It's just a goddamn exam. ?
Remember to be cool and flexible with your own child.
Often when parents do something bad in front of their children, it repeats like a cycle.
Your child will subconsciously be adopting your pattern of anger, vent it out on his own child and break his self-confidence one day. ? And he will do it to his child and it will go on forever. ?
Always learn to listen well. ?
When you talk to people - young or old, boy or girl - you get to know their feelings and above all, you give them the empathy they deserve. ?❤️??
My dear girl,
Daddy and I love you with all our lives.
Board exam is just a board exam.
It isn't the end of the world.
It is just an exam. ?
This isn't going to decide your future.
Only your choices can decide your future.
Good Choice and being good is a sure way to succeed. ?
There are graduates who become terrorists, some become criminals, some unfortunately become unemployed while a vast majority of the crowd live somebody else’s life.
Don’t live somebody else’s life, my child.
Be different. Be you. ?
Always dream and live for the difference.
You will always have our love and support.?
Loving you with all my heart,♥️
Dedicated to all students.